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Nov 19, 2020

Community Brew // When Everything's Not Mapped Out




today i'm joining in with madison over at wetherills say i do and rachel of oh, simple thoughts for their community brew link-up!  community brew is a monthly link-up that is designed for bloggers to be "open, honest, and vulnerable, and to build community with others."  november's prompt is seasons, so join in and tell us a little bit about what season of life you're in!
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a few weeks ago i sat at the island in my parents' kitchen crying to my mom as i described the season that i'm in right now.  because halfway through my twenties, i'm waiting, still in a season of transition, still not putting down roots, though my heart longs for them.


when i was in college, i read a book called here's the hindsight.  it was like sitting down to coffee with an older and wiser friend...the kind of book that i wrote down quotes from and hung them all over my bulletin board above my dorm room desk.  i recently pulled that book back out and flipped through it.  i had forgotten about some of the details of the author's story, and chuckled when i read these words:



i knew what she meant.  i couldn't wait to get my feet on city soil; it seemed like the move to nashville couldn't come quickly enough.  even though i knew it was looming ahead, waiting for it was like waiting for your meal to arrive at a restaurant where everyone else is eating and you're starving.  the anticipation frustrates every breath.
...
i was worried i had doled out too much of the "we may not know what tomorrow holds, but we know who holds tomorrow" rhetoric.  while it's true, it's a hard truth to hang on to when you want everything to be mapped out and to make sense.
-here's to hindsight, p. 57

i nearly laughed out loud reading those words because they so perfectly echo and mirror my season of life.  i know what is looming in the distance, but it's just not quite time yet.  and so i don't know the when or the why of it all, but i do know that there is a reason for where i am. 

one of my favorite books of the bible is ruth.  what i love about ruth is that she was in a season of unknown and waiting.  with her husband gone, she followed her mother-in-law to a land that she didn't know, and there, she waited.  i don't know if ruth knew that god was holding her tomorrow.  after all, she wasn't an israelite and culturally, it wasn't the norm to do what she did by following naomi.  she probably didn't plan on spending her days gathering leftover wheat, but she did anyway, waiting for what might come next; she carried on with the task at hand in faith that god had a plan..and in doing so, waited for what might be better.  and eventually, god delivered.  


god doesn't always (or ever) hand us a road map for the season of life we're in.  mostly, he just asks us to trust that he has our back, that he has a plan.  i don't know where you are right now...maybe you have it all figured out and you're settled into a life, (a job, a family, a house) that will be your season for a long, long time.  or maybe you're like me...waiting for what's next. 

i long for the road map.  to know exactly where i'm headed, exactly what god has for me, exactly when it's all going to happen.  i'm a planner (can you tell?)...i like to know the plan, i like to stick to the plan.  but i'm learning, in this season where i often feel lost and unsure and when the map looks like maybe it was stuffed in the glove compartment for too long and now it's hard to decipher where the roads are leading, i'm learning to press into jesus even more.  i'm learning to stir up the big dreams within my heart, to cover those dreams in prayer, and to pursue him even more deeply.


because if there's one thing i know about the future, it's that no matter where i go or what i do, i want people to know who sent me.  so while i wait, i can think of no better way to spend my time than getting to know him better.


so what about you...do you wish you had a road map for life?  what is your season like right now, or have you ever been where i'm standing?

14 comments:

  1. Betsy, this was so wonderful. I sometimes long for a map too, depending on what part of my life we are talking about. But not having the map, and having to trust him, has taught me so much. While the lessons are a bit tough sometimes, they are always good and important. When you said: " i want people to know who sent me" I had to stop and just think. Definitely journaling about that and praying over that tomorrow! Thank you!

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  2. I'm not really a planner...but I get itchy feet A LOT. But, you know what I love about Ruth? Even though she was in a pretty unfortunate season that required her to WAIT on other people's decisions and circumstances, she worked where she was at and she was faithful. I think in those weird in-between seasons, all we can do is wake up everyday, go on with our lives and be faithful to God! (funny thing is I just started Ruth this morning!) Love what you had to said! :) God will definitely honor your heart and bring you to an incredible season.

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  3. I hear ya friend, I long for the road map too. Sometimes it's beautiful to enjoy the season we're in, even though we want to know the exact next steps.

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  4. Absolutely! I long for the next season way too often when I need to sit back and enjoy what God has given me now. :)

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  5. Such a great reminder! I'm definitely a planner and in a season of waiting also. God has really slowed my body down, too. So I have lots of waiting. He is truly the best thing to lean into.

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  6. Not having the roadmap is the story of my life. I want to know how. I want to know when (soon please). For too many months, I haven't heard a lick of an answer in prayer. Now I have a sense that the answers to my biggest questions are coming soon. But for now I wait, sometimes patiently but mostly with frustration.

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  7. I like to plan too. I tend to have back-up plans for my back-up plans. God has definitely thrown me into an unexpected season of life. My new husband and I thought we would be in Ohio for awhile, and then he lost his job. So now we're figuring out what to do next. It's not always easy to trust God, but I know She has a better plan than I do!

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  8. Oh goodness...I am s.u.c.h. a planner. I feel the exact same way. I have learned over and over and over again that He's "got this"; not me. Right before I got married, I resigned from my teaching job at a small, private school that I love. I spent the e.n.t.i.r.e. summer searching for a job. To be honest, it put a bit of a damper on our honeymoon. By the end of the summer, after three years of teaching, I was only offered an assistant position in the corporation I was hoping to get into. I was bummed, but took the opportunity for a "foot in the door". Little did I know, He had a major plan for me. Within two months, early one morning, I received a phone call to attend a staff meeting. During that staff meeting, I found out that a teacher at an adjoining school had passed away in a car crash. I was pulled into her room. That was one of the most powerful lessons of my life. One of the next, if not equal to that one, was patience in waiting to become pregnant with our first daughter. Once again, hindsight is 20/20. I am learning more and more to just "let go", and let Him control the reigns. Because no matter how much I do to plan and figure out and whatnot, ultimately, my wishes are only that. I can only hope that our plans align well...they seem to be most of the time ;) Blessings!!

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  9. Oh man, I agree. I want a clear, planned out roadmap. I'm one of those type A, huge planning people. But trusting God means handing over the reigns to him & allowing Him to work in my life. I'm also in a season of transition. I'm in grad school & I'm working hard to focus on this season of schooling instead of focusing too much on life & jobs after school.

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  10. I always have to know where I am going too. I have to know and it is hard when I have no idea where I am going or what is going to happen

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  11. I know exactly what you are going through. I felt similar in my mid 20s when everyone was getting married and having kids and I barely had a boyfriend. I was also talking with the hubs last night that we need to enjoy our season of life now not what is going to be in the future.

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  12. AJ and I just talked about that as well! It can be so hard to just be content where you are, but it's so important!

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  13. Me too...thanks so so much for sharing your experiences! It's good to know I'm not alone, and that we can encourage one another based on what we've been through!

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  14. Someone smart once told me that God doesn't give us the map because He'd rather we leaned on Him through the journey. A humbling (but true!) realization for me! Thank you for linking up with us, Betsy!

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Hi! Thanks for reading! I read every comment posted here. Your thoughts are valuable to me! Thanks for taking the time to contribute!

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