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Jan 14, 2015

Advice from 1913



i posted about these books on instagram a few weeks ago after aj and i first got engaged, and so many of you requested more details, that it seemed a blog post was in order.

the night that he popped the question, we ended up back at his house with both of our families, who threw us a little engagement party.  his mom had seen these books and picked them up, and we all have been cracking up reading them out loud to one another here and there.

whether you're married or single, the "advice" in these books will definitely make you laugh.  thanks, blanche from 1913 london, for giving us 21st century brides some, eh, sound pointers on how to keep our men happy.


dont's for wives:
+ don't be out if you can help it when your husband gets home from his day's work.  don't let him have to search the house for you.  listen for his latch-key and meet him on the threshold.

+ don't think it too much trouble to sing or play in an evening with your husband as the sole audience. you couldn't have a more indulgent or appreciative one, as a general rule.

+ don't object to your husband spending saturday afternoons playing cricket if you can't play too.  you can watch, or you can enjoy some pleasure that is not in his line, and it is advisable for him to have outdoor recreation.

+ don't object to your husband getting a motor-bicycle; merely insist that he shall buy a side car for you at the same time.

+ don't persist on having mushrooms on the table when you know they always make your husband ill.  they may be your favorite dish, but is it worth it?
(side note on this one:  i like mushrooms, aj does not.  however, i will not be omitting them from my diet when we're married.  sorry blanche.)


dont's for husbands:
+ don't forget that you are not immortal.  what chance will she have if you die and leave her with no knowledge of the ways of the wicked world?

+ don't try to be a sultan.  this is the west; and you can't shut your wife away from other men.  don't insult her by trying to.

+ don't encourage her to be hysterical.  you need not be unkind, but you can firmly refuse to pity her.

+ don't try to dress your wife in the fashions of ten years ago.  some men can never like anything newer than that; but a woman does not want to look as if she came out of the ark.

+ don't let your wife feel that your dinner is the be-all and end-all of your existence.  enjoy your food by all means, but don't make a fetish of it.


i should mention that there really is some good advice in these books.  one of my favorites is:  don't forget to be your wife's best friend as well as her husband.  true friendship in marriage does away with all sorts of trouble.

what is the best, or funniest, marriage or relationship advice you've ever received?

32 comments:

  1. HA! I think my boyfriend would be more than a little annoyed if I both "met him on the threshold" and subjected him to solo singing performances!! Also, while a man isn't supposed to dress his wife in archaic fashion... does that means it's ok for him to dress her in general? LOL I love it!

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  2. Some of these are too funny! My my, how the times have changed. My grandmother still practiced many of these rules when my grandfather was still alive. Thanks for sharing these!

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  3. "you can watch." Haha! These are so funny!

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  4. Oh my goodness, this is hilarious! I would love to read these books sometime. They sound like a hilarious read. Thanks for sharing these little tidbits from the books, they made my day!

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  5. Oh wow...that is some...interesting advise! Lol! Thanks for sharing, made my day!

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  6. LOL these are awesome! I love the motor-bicycle and sidecar one. Make that man buy you a sidecar! :D

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  7. Some of these are HILARIOUS! Guys, don't make eating your dinner a fetish ha. I love these! Old stuff is my favorite. And I totally want a side car.

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  8. oh my gosh, i know! the side car thing kills me. hahaha

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  9. yes! cracks. me. up! just the language alone is funny :)

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  10. they are! and they're tiny, so you could sit and read the whole thing in about an hour...they're fun to flip through!

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  11. that one is one of my favorites. because girls definitely cannot play cricket.

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  12. they make me laugh every time i read them! there really are some good gems in the book, but mostly, they're fun to giggle at!

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  13. haha i think that the author was stating that since your man is paying for your clothes, he has some say in them, so yes? maybe? haha (but my favorite part is "a woman does not want to look as if she came off of the ark")

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  14. These are too funny and this was is totally my don't try to dress your wife in the fashions of ten years ago. some men can never like anything newer than that; but a woman does not want to look as if she came out of the ark." Thank you for sharing these!

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  15. Oh my this is the prefect books lol! Although they are funny and hysterical they hold some truth to them! Wife life is the best:)

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  16. This is HILARIOUS. My favorite: "Don't try to dress your wife in the fashions of ten years ago. some men can never like anything newer than that; but a woman does not want to look as if she came out of the ark."

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  17. omg no no no, THIS. "don't encourage her to be hysterical. you need not be unkind, but you can firmly refuse to pity her." bahahaha!!!

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  18. hahahaha i can't even handle that one! first of all, does any woman ever think "oh, this dress is so old, it looks like i walked off the ark!" (probably going to be my new thing that i say instead of "i don't have anything to wear")
    also, is it just me or does the hysterical one sound like you should basically just lock your wife away in an asylum instead of saying something normal like "it's ok, honey, things will get better"???

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  19. BAHAHAHAHAHA. Yeah, Betsy, meet him at the door, ride in his sidecar, and serenade him. Plus, if you try to stop yourself from getting yourself hysterical, AJ won't even have to have to bother with pitying you! Thanks for sharing!

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  20. My dad and mom found an old article on marriage several years ago and there were some funny ones in there, too. I think the one that shocked me most was "Wives, do not demand to know where your husband has been. Even if he has been out all night." 0.o I don't think I can stand by that one.

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  21. Is it odd that the don'ts for wives didn't bother me much? Maybe a bit dated, but there's some good advice in there. I try to greet my husband at the door and let him know I am glad to see him. I don't complain one iota about his various softball seasons because I believe a man who does mental work all day needs some physical outlet. And he's the reason I don't cook brussel sprouts often even though I love them.
    As for the ones for men... meh. Don't encourage her to be hystetical? Reaaaally?? Pu-leeze!!

    Beckey
    http://reallyreallyrealhousewives.blogspot.com
    http://www.etsy.com/shop/queenbsbusywork

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  22. Ahahahaha the advice for the wives seems reasonable, but the advice for the husbands is hilarious! Thanks, Betsy!

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  23. Ha the motorcycle one for wives is my favorite. I'm just picturing Seth buying himself a motorcycle and a sidecar for me....ha

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  24. I gave both of those books to my friend and her Husband as part of their wedding gift last year! They love looking through them from time to time for a laugh!

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  25. This is awesome! Sending this to the husband right now. Thanks for sharing. :)


    Anna | richaskings.com

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  26. This made my day! I need to purchase these books for an an upcoming wedding I'm going too! Thanks for sharing!

    Trish
    www.thetrishlist.com

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  27. Oh man, were they serious with this stuff? Oh how times have changed... good thing those stood the test of time to amuse us in 2015 though!

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  28. It is the funniest book! I only have the one for wives but I laughed so hard reading it - we read bits from it throughout my bachelorette day out lol

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  29. MeganReablog.wordpress.comJanuary 20, 2015 at 9:46 PM

    "what chance will she have if you die and leave her with no knowledge of the ways of the wicked world?" lol! That hilarious! Thanks for sharing Betsy! :)

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